Selfish lover in bed can be one of the most irritating snags of life; the worst agony about the problem is that it cannot be discussed with everybody. Are you facing a problem where you are finding consistently that your sex life is getting dissatisfactory and upsetting? Do you find that your lover is not attending your need properly and as a result, you are lacking the orgasm you need to enjoy? If the answers are yes, you can safely assume that your partner is acting selfish in bed and this situation should not linger for long!
Try to communicate him about his shortfall in a loving way
Being selfish at bed is a sensitive issue and you will not be able to sort it out by accusing each other. You need to sit and talk with each other lovingly. Here as the shortfall is caused by your boyfriend’s behavior, you need to take an active step with best possible affection and respect for your mutual relationship.
Discuss with him what make you stimulated, or what gesture of him you like most. If not overtly, give him sober hints that you need more attention from him at the time of your physical intimacy.
Try to add some changes in your personal life
Try to add some positive change in your nuptial life. For example, spend some more time in weekends with each other, attend parties or weekend outing with couples who are known for their great chemistry, etc. The impact will surely be positive if your boyfriend is of sensitive nature. You can add some new activities in your bedroom life, which may work as a stimulant for him.
Self-service can be a temporary solution
Self-service is really not the substitute of coitus but it will help you to enjoy the orgasm. It will help you to pacify your physical longing and you get more space to bridge the emotional gap, if any, between you two. This is not the remedy to the problem called Selfish lover in bed, but it is a quick fix to the issue.
Try to understand his problem
Every coin has two sides, so is about your boyfriend. Try to understand his problem like if he is suffering from some physical problem like erectile dysfunction or quick ejaculation issue. His hectic life and unconditional tiredness can be one of the hindrances behind his quickie fondness.
According to Michael Perry,Ph.D., author of “What Women Really Want”, men stops feeling the urge to prove him in bed once he feels that the relation is stable, and there he stops playing the role of a wooing lover. The key to revive the fire in a seasoned relationship is to discuss “The focus on how he can benefit, not what he is been doing unjustified” according to Dr. Perry.
However, there are several instances that despite best support and trial, the problem of selfish lover in bed persists at the same level. This is definitely an irritating situation and can be unhealthy for you also. If you cannot break the ice of selfishness of your boyfriend despite your best effort, it is a clear signal that you need to move on perhaps. The ball is in your court!
A feminist by heart, Swagata has 8 years’ experience in content development and marketing. She is a passionate writer with an inherent knack to inspire women for a general well-being in their lifestyle.