Being cheated on is always tough to deal with. It makes you question your worth and you start judging yourself from the point of view of someone else’s perspectives. You feel like a disaster because falling out of love for no specific reason and then breaking up is one thing to deal with and your partner choosing someone else over you is another thing. While both are equally hard to deal with, the latter feels almost like a huge defeat. You actually feel undeserving of love again and seclude yourself from people fearing having to go through the same fate again. You find it hard to believe that someone could leave you like that and this has serious repercussions on your confidence level which will affect or alter your decision making capability later in life. To save yourself from major fallouts later in life with other relationships, here is what you could do to regain your lost confidence as a result of a breakup.
You are not the one to blame
As much as you would like to justify his cheating by blaming yourself for everything that happened, this will never give you peace. You cannot always keep saving him and taking all the blame on yourself for his lapse of judgements. Defending him all the time will only make you miss him more and you will want to get back to him only to get cheated again. Even when you might have had problems being together, there is still no justification to cheating. If you feel bad about being cheated on despite being the best possible partner ever, then realise that your partner was the one who had other issues that manifested in the form of cheating. So, be at peace with yourself and accept what happened. You can’t do anything about how people behave with you. After all, for how long can you take the responsibility for people’s actions?
Be with people you confide in
Those people who have been the closest to you know what you are like when you are happy or sad. They understand you emotions better than anyone else. Your secrets are safe with them and they would never hurt you like random people would. When you need them the most, they are in the best possible position to help you get closer to your real self and find your lost confidence back. Basically, you must have noticed when someone isn’t right for you, your close people are the one who identify them the soonest. Their love for your is unconditional and always make time for them for that is where you will be reminded of your positive traits and also get a better reflection of your negative traits. They will build you back to your old self. So, be around them the most and trust what they say.
Focus on relaxing
Stay relaxed. Let not a romantic relationship determine who you are or do what makes you feel nice about yourself. The idea is to get in touch with your real self and do what’s best for your mental peace and happiness. If you confine yourself to a room and don’t let the good things flow in, you will be depriving yourself of all the great opportunities to regain your confidence back. Travel to places you have always wanted to. Make new connections. Engage yourself in the hobbies that you like. This will help you stay distracted.
Focusing on your broken self esteem now is the worst thing that you can do now. Lighten up your mood in whichever way that suits you and you will find a surge in your confidence. Set small targets or goals and this will help you feel so much better about your abilities. Make sure you upgrade yourself in every possible way. This may be the way you look or feeding your mind with more knowledge so that you become a better version of yourself.
Seek professional help
Cheating can take a toll on people. It is difficult to get out of the situation and some professional help should be sought if the situation gets out of hand. Get someone to talk to you and listen to the entire narrative. Be honest with your answers so that they can give you a clear picture of how things need to move henceforth. If you try and sort things out yourself, you might draw biased conclusions which will never be useful in gaining a perspective and moving ahead on a positive note. You should never feel embarrassed of seeking professional help. There is nothing wrong with it. You are in charge of your own life. Do what you have to regardless of what people tell you. Gaining your confidence back is what you need right now.