It feels strange at times to calm ourselves with the belief regarding who is more suitable for us in the coming years. Love and friendship are like the delicate petals of a flower, too easy to pluck but difficult to mould it in our hands. We often wonder if being friends is the first step of a long-lasting relationship! Love florets between two individuals only with the passage of time, based on a sound sense of understanding and knowing each other well. There will always be a difference in our approach when we carry out a conversation with our ‘friend’ and ‘lover’ respectively.
Similarly, the expectations, wants and desires also keeps varying. A friendship may exist between a boy and a girl, but chances are there will be a hesitation in taking it forward to the next level. But then others may reject this notion stating that they secretly felt for the ‘other.’ The bodily temptation is often the result of a compressed and well-built togetherness. There are possibilities of a relationship based on friendship not turning into love. But always remember it is very considerable to equate on the ground of friendliness before springing into a relationship. When a friend becomes your lover, you are witnessing the person not in parts but as a ‘whole.’ Moreover, you are accepting your friend as your partner because the choices were reciprocated.
Before being addressed as lovers, it is therefore, necessary to begin with friendship and making the base stronger. Because when you do so, the notion of judgement and decisions are nurtured well by taking time and finally making a conclusion out of it.
YOU CAN PLACE your CONFIDENCE IN HIM
Before bouncing into an affair, if the partners had been friends, then that relationship it built upon assurance, reliance and understanding. The more you give each other time and space when you are friends, one’s likes and dislikes seems to be more transparent. Since both of them know each other’s choices within the comfort level of a friend zone, the after effect of getting into small rifts tends to become less derogatory. This is perhaps one of the most reasonable statement of being friends before turning into lovers. Since the preferences and weaknesses of one another are revealed, both of them would be careful enough to take decisions without hurting each other. Not only will this make the relationship base stronger, but at the same time wrap up the beautiful appraisals for a blissful future.
YOU DON’T HAVE TO START FROM SCRATCH
When a boy and a girl are just friends they are able to gel well with one another. This is because amidst the gossips, chit chats and sharing funny jokes you are also able to draw out certain interesting facts previously unaware of. When you already get acquainted with a person time is less consumed in knowing further about him/her. In the process of the conversation, and the duration of time spend with one another you will be able to feel the genuine excitability. Therefore, if you develop a feeling you will be able to speak your heart out in an instant moment without much hesitation, and also know the other’s reaction as well. Elementary fascination should be highlighted more than a mere attraction. If you straightaway jump into a relationship, then that charm gets lost in the process. The minute happiness in appreciating each other slowly diminishes because of interference of friends, since they are only left to pass the remark” they look so good together.”
BEING AWARE THAT YOU BOTH CAN BE CRAZY TOGETHER
We all know that friendship is built upon craziness. This is perhaps one of the most primary reasons for this speciality. Each and every one of us have a fine distinguishing line between a friend and a best friend with whom sharing our innermost joys and sorrows makes us feel better. They are the ones who will call us in the midnight and gossip for hours over reasons unknown. On the other hand, they will also be the one who would plan for a short trip, a bike or a car ride and even in certain cases a late-night movie show! This is exactly the mirror reflection you want to see in your boyfriend/ girlfriend isn’t? You want your partner to be instilled with those qualities whereby on one hand he/she understands your sense of humour, craziness and fun loving moods as well as on the other hand, the times when you are stony-faced and thoughtful. You cannot possibly know that by just a mere glimpse at his/her face. So, for this reason the notion is, friendship needs to be juxtaposed with the mood swings of one’s behaviour before landing into a hook up.
YOU GIVE THE RELATIONSHIP A CHANCE TO BE SCHEDULED IT’s OWN WAY
Anything in haste ruins a relationship. If both of you as friends have developed feelings for one another, then it is well and good. Always keep in mind that in these cases there is no need of an urgency. There are situations when you might just fall in love with your friend. These are the traits one shall be seeking in his/her beloved. Giving the title of a boyfriend or a girlfriend sounds good, but also one needs to be aware of the entanglements that comes along with it. When you are looking into each other’s eyes as friends not only do you appreciate the term ‘compatriot’, but at the same time assure yourself with the belief, that this is someone whom you would like to spend the rest of your life with. So long as you feel secured within the comfort level between the two of you, you don’t have to care about what the others say.
A GLIMPSE INTO EACH OTHER’S PAST
Since you are giving time to each other as friends, it is natural that most of the conversations will shed a new light on the topics discussed. As friends sharing things about past relationships would be more convenient. Both of you can exchange advices and make the best out of it when it comes to relationship issues. Supposedly, you like your friend and as a person you know about his/her character revolving around flirty attitude, bad gestures or a rumour of cheating their ex- partners make sure you remain aware from beforehand itself. Till the relationship is grounded on a friendship level by taking into consideration its flaws it is fine. But make sure you are properly judgemental in your own terms of psychology because nothing would be more disheartening if the relationship ends, despite knowing how your friend exactly was.
YOU WONT BE HESITATING TO OPEN UP
We often come across people who would say that it was tough for him/her to open up, since they were unknown to their respective partners. Such a situation is not only governed by a slow progression but also a doubtful feeling of being too modest and speaking your mind out in front of him/her. However, if you start the relationship by remaining friends such issues shall never take place. This is so because, you know each other so well that the word ‘hesitation’ won’t act as a barrier between you both. Nothing seems more soothing when the communication flows smoothly. If you both are really friends, you can decide regarding your future if chances are there that you both are willing to settle down together. And even if it doesn’t work as a couple you can still return within the comfort zone of a friend’s level. We are all unaware of our fate. Maybe you both are destined to be a couple, and who knows the relationship might take place sooner or later! But till you are with that person make sure you become a part of him and not just a passing phase.
For introducing yourselves as a perfect match for one another, raise the toast of friendship first. This relationship of gossips, chit chats, tiny rifts will ultimately make your cheeks blush because you will be in love with that crazy friend of yours. And it is through these paths of friendship that one day you will walk hand in hand as lovers and never regret your choice for a long enduring alliance.
Chirasree is highly fond of reading and writing and wishes to create a special niche for herself. She feels that her imaginative skill enhances her potential for writing more. Pursuing literature and an interest in theory and philosophy has inspired her to indulge in books.