Romantic split ups sting and there is no way you can avoid the pain that comes with it unless you were never into it. People break up all the time and everyone faces break up at least once in their life. There are some who have to endure this more than once. When a relationship ends, it is obvious that it is going to be hard. You were so used to the person, to the relationship and the affection that you do not know what to do anymore. You feel this void that can’t be filled by anyone. Even if you get involved with someone after having a bad breakup it will just be a rebound.
No matter what your friends do for you to get over your ex, it is not going to happen unless you are ready for it. Your friends might try to set you up with a blind date or plan on going out but all of it is vain if you are still not over the pain.
No one understands exactly what you are going through because people feel and react differently to every situation. That is why you should do what you feel is best for you. Here are few ways you should deal with your breakup instead of letting others to help you through it.
Take Some Time To Mourn For The Loss And To Deal With The Pain
One of the most important steps in the healing process is to let yourself grieve. Just acknowledge the hurt only then you will be able to move forward.
As much as people push you to get out and have fun with others, it might just not be the best thing to do right after the breakup. This won’t help you to get through the pain but just hide it under your smile. In fact, it is better to take some time for yourself. No, you don’t really have to cry while binge watching the movies because it just happens in movies. In reality, chick flick movies might make you even sadder. Do whatever feels right for you. If you want to vent it out then do it and let go of the pain that way. Just learn to deal with it, not conceal it. Concealing the pain means letting it affect your future. Let it all out and slowly you’ll see that the tears will diminish. Your healing process has already begun.
Allow Yourself Some Peaceful Solitude
Yes, some people find themselves back when they are surrounded by the people they love but the healing process won’t be complete until you devote some time for yourself, be who you are and are ready to move forward with your life. Be comfortable in your company. Establish yourself in such a way that you enjoy solitary things on your own.
Pamper yourself because you don’t have to punish yourself. Separation does that to people. Some people chose to punish themselves or mope around endlessly. They forget that it was inevitable to avoid the split up. Don’t self-blame or avoid yourself because that’s not the right thing to do. You should know that you deserve all the care. Eat good food; pamper yourself with showers, chocolates or coffee or whatever it is you like and be your own best friend.
Take A Long Walk
What good would a long walk do? It is so much help when it comes to clearing your mind. Do not go on a walk in secluded streets. Take a walk in the streets that are full of people and buzzing with noise. You can also take a walk on the streets, park or playground that you like. If you take a walk along the park then even better, because the greenery, the kids playing around, all of it will remind you what you are actually missing out on life by being all bunched up in the house.
Also, make sure that it is a long walk. Taking a long walk allows your mind to connect to what all is going on around you. Your mind automatically starts analyzing things and it also helps in meditation if you walk around a park. Give it a thought and try it once, you’ll see that your thoughts get clearer when you are out on a walk all on your own. This is a better thing to do when you don’t want to hang out with anyone and still don’t feel like being stuck in your room all day.
Go On A Solo Trip
Ever tried going on a trip alone? If yes, then you know how it works and how fun it can be. Sure, it is scary in some parts but refreshing nonetheless. As mentioned earlier that as much as your friends convince you to go out with them, one of the important therapy might be to be by yourself. Spending time with yourself will give you an insight of every feeling that you have and eventually you’ll learn to get over them.
Sometimes when you stay at your own place, everything around you reminds you of the same person. When you are trying to forget such person it becomes extremely hard to do so in familiar surroundings. So the best option is to take a trip alone, enjoy it and it will prove to be one of the best transformative experiences you have had in life.
Do Things That Make You Happy
When you are finally over your ex and you have no tears left to shed for the nasty break up you had, it is time to make yourself feel special. Engage in all the activities you might have missed while you were in pain or do the things that you always wanted to do. I am not saying that it is going to help you forget the person but it will push you to do things more for yourself. You’ll realize that you are the source of your own happiness. You have to think of yourself first and not worry about anyone else at least at this point of time.
Get Yourself Something New And Nice
I know you might be thinking that this point is vain but it isn’t. Do you know how therapeutic shopping can be? Be it a girl or a guy, shopping definitely helps. I don’t mean to say that spending money is going to erase the terrible experience or break up you had. But gifting yourself nice things means you are finally ready to move on. You can even get a new haircut. It gives you this sick sense of satisfaction to rock a new haircut and flip your new cut locks. Some people also find satisfaction in buying new lingerie. Well, everyone has their own choice, which one is yours? Buy anything that will give you immense satisfaction.
There is no use in being stuck in the same phase of romantic split up when the other person has already left and moved on. Treat yourself because you deserve everything, no matter how superficial it is. Break ups are never easy so cry as much as you want to, but once you stop don’t go back to crying. Make it a point to recover from it and come out as a new and better person.
Anisha is an aspiring writer. She's a graduate in BBM. An ambivert by
nature, she is very fond of reading sappy romantic novels, passionate
about singing, cooking and dancing, holds a keen interest in learning
new things and wanderlust.