Every relationship wrangles up at some point in time. During that time, it becomes nearly suffocating and partners tend to blame each other or invite some unhealthy form of communication. The repeated application of these unhealthy patterns in a relationship often spoils the bond and brings the relationship to an end. Here are the traps you unknowingly fall into.
Lack of trust is a common bugbear in a relationship and it is radiated in the form of jealousy or envy. And I am sure, most of you would agree that it seeds maximum fights in a relationship. You wish to have real and an open minded communication between your partners but at the same time pound him with a zillion questions when he discloses all his dealings. Distrust makes you vulnerable to the feelings of betrayal and thus, weakens the bond. Therefore, it is an issue you must sort out, either by consulting a counselor or by finding the deep-seated issues.
This is one of the most unpleasant things in a relationship. Your insecurity about yourself or maybe your partner can result in self-worthlessness. Although it is true that everyone undergoes times of self-doubt but if it broods over your mind every time and all the time, then you have an issue there. Being insecure about your body, looks, societal status etc. can coach the wrestling ghosts inside of you and you will see that you have forgotten the love, while all you do is draw comparisons. One must get expert help to curb insecurities.
This means that you are a cling maniac and you do not allow your partner to have his own comfortable space. We understand that you love being around him and that you like his company, but you need to grasp that you are two different individuals who should be living other segments of life such as friends, family etc. by themselves. You become obsessed about you partner and throw a tantrum every time he wishes to go out for to an event without you. This isn’t the right thing to do as your partner will easily get irritated with you as we all know that men dislike the idea of over-sharing and lack of faith makes them pressurized.
THE NEATNESS FREAK MODE
There are people who simply cannot stand in a place that is not orderly arranged and such people can be a nightmare to date as they can go frenzy if they do not find everything intact and tidy. We understand that cleanliness is a very important thing but getting agitated every single time for petty things can make your partner uncomfortable at his own place. You do not need to be the best housekeeper all the time and may be you can indulge in come cleaning by keeping some sexual favours as the end prize (wink)!
Crying like a baby, throwing tantrums and emotional blackmailing are the main signs of this problem and if you are into any of them, then let me warn you that you aren’t acing the right track. Crying in public places, screaming and yelling at your partner or self-harming is not the way out of anything. So remember that you should introspect yourself, pen down your feelings or check with a trusted friend or family member and ask them for help.
So these are common love traps you fall into and sabotage your relationship. If your relationship is on a downhill, then opt for healthy communication, be a good listener, do not jump into conclusions immediately. Remember that you are not playing against each other, you are a team and you should stand by each other!
Ashwathi is an enthusiastic traveller and dancer with a passion for movies and music. Hailing from an Army background, she considers herself fortunate enough to have experienced the diverse cultures that India boasts of. She is a graduate in Journalism and Mass Communications and has worked in print, radio and television.