Kids are often considered as notorious, so much so that parents leave no stone unturned to bring them back on track. “Yelling” is perhaps considered as the easiest weapon by the elders to hit them with verbal accusations. However, the question arises are they successful in doing it? Not all kids are the same; yet why do parents forcibly indulge themselves to scold the kids every now and then? Of course it is one’s own personal matter, for no one has the right to interfere while raising up kids on their own. But what matters the most is that scolding isn’t the only solution, for parents/ elders remain unknown to the aftereffect of such a harsh consequence! In the process of shouting they are in return slowly downgrading the behavioral pattern of the kids, which ultimately leads to intense woefulness.
Shouting at kids is a serious issue, and needs to be handled with extreme care. For all those who are still struck at the same old path of yelling and whooping, here’s a quick reminder of why shouting at kids is essentially harmful.
A TENDENCY TOWARDS AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR
Parents who yell at their kids every now and then, develop an aggressive behavior. Since they are brought up under the influence of rapacious parents, the kids find this particular behavior normal and therefore try to imitate the same destructive behavior within themselves. Whether its physical or psychological, all issues related to the child must be judged in terms of proper care and support. Moreover, shouting makes the child remain in a panic stricken state increasing their destructive mindset. Exposure to such a situation increases aggression and onslaught in behavior.
TELLING LIES AND DEVELOPING A FEELING OF BEING UNWANTED
When parents fail to understand their kids what prevails thereafter is a sense of insecurity. Since support, nurture and care remains aloof at their own residence itself, the kid will eventually develop the feeling of being unwanted and not being heard. Since home and parents becomes unfamiliar to the child’s thoughts and emotions, the kid slowly begins to lie and forms a kind of disengagement with the family.
SHOWING A SUDDEN DISINTEREST TOWARDS STUDIES
An educational institution will teach your kid the subjects allotted in accordance with the routine. The same kid performing well in class may suddenly become non-studious if the home where he stays isn’t a healthy environment. The kid finds minimum solace within the school premises, but once he returns back home the same old yelling continues. This is not only a psychological offence leading to a non-supportive environment but also affects a child’s academic performance. The feeling of hesitancy, self doubt, lack of confidence and lack of single -mindedness could lead to the child losing interest in academics.
DEVELOPING A FEAR
If you think that scolding is the easiest means to bring order into your child’s life, then you are mistaken. Hence, do keep thinking over the matter. Who knows that indirectly as parents you are ruining your own image in front of your kids? You may be the sole reason, why the child is so scared every now and then. You may also be the reason that the child wants to stay all alone without much expectation from his parents. Unnecessary shouting demoralizes the child, making him feel insignificant and eventually he fears the aftermath of his sensitivity.
REFLECTION OF A POOR CONCENTRATION
Constant yelling instead of boosting up, lowers the concentration level to such an extent, that the child gets lost in the middle way of making a decision. As adults when we ourselves can no longer bear an unhealthy environment, think about those kids who are the victims within the four walls of the house! Once concentration is disturbed, it takes a long time to settle things in the right way. Fear of failure compiled with its consequences somehow produces a gap between a child’s mental state and the keen desire to do anything of one’s own choice. Since the kid fears to share his wants and desires with parents what prevails therefore is the incapacity of molding various skills.
DEVELOPING A CRIPPLED CONFIDENCE FROM WITHIN
If you constantly shout at your kid, chances are that it may result in forming a deprived self content and impudence in him. This will further not only lower the child’s courage but at the same time ruin future relationships with others. Self confidence is instilled only when the kid is given proper attention, support, love and value to his opinions. It must be noted that, children who are constantly under the yelling pressure of parents/elders, eventually build up a broken confidence, and this indeed needs to be taken care of.
AROUSING A SENSE OF LONELINESS
Always remember, that is no remedy for mental sickness. Kids who are often yelled at by parents or relatives usually suffer from loneliness. As a result of which they constantly overthink, and may even have suicidal tendencies. The feeling of being unwanted haunts them every single day since their feelings and emotions remain bizarre. Loneliness envelopes them even during happy moments, for pain, grief, and sorrow constantly keeps coming and going in their lives even at such a small age.
UNABLE TO SOCIALISE WITH OTHERS
Constant shouting at your child, will ruin the situation in the worse manner. Kids who are subjected to constant verbal abuse every now and then, are usually found to have a very pitiable aptitude. They are unable to mingle with outsiders, and even kids of the same age group. Since there is no root origin with regard to what exactly the parents want, domination forms a crux in making a gap between the child and the society. The outside world therefore becomes a kind of invalid spree for the kid, by making his own self torturous only within the four walls through less interactions.
SOME WAYS TO BRING THE CHILD CLOSER TO YOU
. As parents/ elders always lend a patient ear to your kid’s problem, and make a quick solution to it.
. Remain calm, and listen to what your child has to say first, and then rectify his errors.
. Keep encouraging your kid, no matter what the situation is. This will essentially boost up the lost confidence.
. As parents remain positive and supportive in your approach towards the child. Remember good vibes,easily brings in a smile to your child’s face, and won’t be hesitating to hide anything.
. Give your child the opportunity to discuss their issues with you and avoid being unduly judgmental.
. If you see your child sitting all alone, do not simply ignore the situation. Rather sit beside him/her, and engage into fun loving topics.
. Make the child feel comfortable in front of you, so that he shares his problems in the best possible manner.
. Above all, make your child feel special. Make them realize their importance into your lives. Never forget to shower the warmth of a mother’s love or a father’s care. Your child will grow up and reach the stage of an adult. Therefore, let no hindrances spoil the core of nurture, because they too will have a family in the future. Set good examples as a part of the reflection for the forthcoming generations, and feel proud of your upbringing.
Chirasree is highly fond of reading and writing and wishes to create a special niche for herself. She feels that her imaginative skill enhances her potential for writing more. Pursuing literature and an interest in theory and philosophy has inspired her to indulge in books.