Divorces have become quite common these days owing to mechanical and stressed out metro lives. Divorce, no matter how much someone wants it, has a great impact on the psychological health of both the partners. But in the Indian society, divorce is still considered to be a taboo and hence, divorcees face a common question “Is it right or wrong to be single after divorce?” Divorcees wonder whether they should hold on to their bitter experience and memories of their previous marriage or get married and plan a secured future.
This article would clear your confusion so that you come abreast with the reality.
The actual reason
Individualism is what the society focuses on these days and while individuality is good, focusing on individuality alone can have serious repercussions on your relationships in the long run. There is a thin line of difference in being selfish and in creating a positive self. Both the partners should participate in making a marriage work. When either or both the partners react selfishly and negatively on any issue, no matter whether it is big or small, there is bound to be differences and problems and all these can lead to divorce eventually.
Divorce is a serious life event but life moves on. Though nobody is indispensable, marriage after divorce should be considered normal and healthy as everybody deserves to live a happy life and nobody can live alone.
Facts to be considered
- Are you over with the trauma of separation?
Most people do not have the strength to accept the trauma of separation and continue with the blame game. It is important to get over with the negative feelings to be happy in the second marriage.
- Do you know your weakness?
In most of the cases, a divorce does not happen due to the fault of only one person. Access your weakness and see what your fault was that led to such an outcome. Even if it is lack of awareness, ignorance, lack of communication or anything else that aggravated the issue, it is important that you consult a professional or go through self-help books to get over it.
- Did you learn from the past?
Life is the best teacher and all the things that you experienced in your married life must have taught you a lot about life. The suffering would end, when you discover what you have learnt from your failed marriage. This would also help in creating better relationships in near future.
Your parents and loved ones would ask you to settle down again in life and remind you about the cons of living alone as they would want to be with someone who can look after you. But there should be no hurry as marriage is a lifetime decision. Take as much time as you want to decide about your second marriage.
Initially you will feel very lonely and you might jump into any proposal that comes your way. Resist such temptations to avoid bigger pains.
Spend time with yourself and your loved ones and take the decision only when you are ready.