Living with your partner before wedding : pros and cons


Marriage is a huge decision. Especially for a woman in a patriarchal family who has to leave everything behind and accept her in- laws as her family. The Indian law doesn’t hold live- in relationships or cohabitation with a partner illegal. It is now quite common among youngsters to take independent decisions, move out of their homes and stay with someone they love, even before you acquire social sanction to cohabitate with marriage. Education and exposure to the western culture has brought about this change. Everything comes with its own set of problems and benefits. According to The Times of India, The Supreme Court of India states, “if a man and woman lived “like husband and wife” for a long period and had children, then the judiciary would presume that the two were married and the woman would be eligible to inherit the property after death of her partner.”

The Advantages :

  • Such relationships are healthy in a way, they do not take a toll on you. You are under no compulsion to tolerate things that you don’t want to. This is not quite possible in case of a married couple, where the woman especially has to bear the burden in an Indian society. We are taught to take any kind of nonsense that the husband may inflict upon us, much because, the fear of divorce looms large. A woman in an Indian society has to face serious social consequences in case she ends up getting divorced.
  • You do not have to take the other person’s responsibilities. You can also steer clear of dealing with nagging relatives. You can stay on your own and decide how to manage your finances on your own terms. Both the partners can ensure they are on the same page if they decide to share the earnings. There’s a lot more freedom that comes with a live- in relationship.
  • It also guarantees a compatibility check before you decide on tying the knot. You do not need to sulk over how you overlooked an annoying trait in your partner, which is what most married couples regret later. You can get a clearer picture of how marrying the person in the future might be like, or how his equations with his family are and how he deals with crisis. If things get pretty monotonous, you at least have the option of taking a break and can move back together ifyou want to, later. You can change an incompatible partner in case of differences or if you have a commitment issue. Married couples are but left with little options.

The Disadvantages:

  • Nonetheless, live- in doesn’t provide a woman with enough security as does marriage in India.
  • Since the terms of being together are so loose, it is but easier to drop support for your partner.
  • With no hard and fast commitment, most people fail to put in a lot of effort to make the relationship work.
  • Women suffer biologically too, since their fertility clocks have a limited time period and if marriage bells ring late, it might be hard for her to conceive.


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