We have a number of understandings about sex but it isn’t all too easy to access if at all you share a healthy sexual relationship with your partner. Do you know if your intimate relationship with your partner is appropriate? Or you have just killed it in the bud from blooming just by expecting too much?
What happens between the sheets is much more than just a physical bond. Sex keeps you happier, boosts your immune system, fights anxiety and depression and of course, a greater emotional attachment to your partner. However, people encounter problems in maintaining their sex lives. It is quite a common question that affects people, whether the level of their intimacy is any better than others or what constitutes healthy and what doesn’t. Dysfunction can be blamed upon decreasing levels of understanding and commitment to each other. Your sex life is unhealthy when your relationship suffers from tension, abuse and frustration. When you start avoiding your partner and refrain from physical touch, your sex life suffers.
We tend to over expect from our partners in terms their body image, skill and even beauty. This can partly be blamed upon the standard portrayal of beauty. Any deviation from it suffers from a lack of acceptance. As a result when our expectations aren’t met, we judge and avoid. This doesn’t apply solely to a particular gender. Even men suffer from pressures of performance.
You know you have a healthy sex life with your partner when:
When you are confident of your body image:
If you take pride in the skin you are in, you perform well. In a study conducted by the University of Texas, it was found that women who are more comfortable in their skin, have a better and healthier sex life. When you concentrate too much on how your body image is you hinder the process of feeling all the sensations while having sex. Exercising boosts your self- confidence that way since you work your way out to achieving what you know would keep your distractions away.
You share a mutual affinity for intimacy and satisfaction:
It is a rare phenomenon when each partner achieves orgasms at the same time or even during a single intercourse. Nonetheless, the experience is worth it and both of you share a mutual desire for it. Both of your know what you want and aren’t afraid to ask for it. Expecting your partner to be a mind reader is unfair for he never can. However, if your partner is eager to indulge with you and teach you what you don’t already know and is responsive to what you need or hope for, you have a healthy sex life.
You don’t keep a count:
Whether you have sex everyday or not, it doesn’t count. Your sex life is all about the quality of your experience and not the quantity. According to a research reported by the Journal of Economic Behaviour and Organisation, people didn’t notice an improvement in their sex lives despite increasing the number of times they had sex to double. When you make it mandatory for yourself to have sex it becomes just another chore and diminishes your passion. Hence, your sex life gets affected.
You are aware of the times you need change:
A stagnant sex life is boring and tends to shut your creative energies down. When you know that your partner wishes for more but you aren’t being able to deliver, you need to work on rejuvenating your sex life. A boring sex routine doesn’t take your sex life anywhere for you partner can tell when you are faking it. However, when both the partners are open to change and are always looking for avenues to make things spicier, they do share a healthy sex life.
Sex makes you happier:
A study conducted by the Social Science Research shows that there exists a huge relationship between being happy and having a healthy sex life. Conversely, when you are happy with your partner in the relationship, your way of finding satisfaction in the bed as well gets more creative. So, if you are still very active in your relationship, you will be happy sexually too.
Now that you know these, it will be easier for you to assess the status of your sex life and work on it if it needs your attention.
Born and brought up in India, Anushree's thoughts have been conditioned by a surrounding diverse in all aspects. She aspires to travel round the world and have a taste of the culture, food and music. Her Masters in Political Science has given her a reality check as to where India stands in enlightening its womenfolk. Writing gives her the freedom to materialize her ideas and allow people to sneak into her mind. She finds it fun and liberating.