Loving someone and being loved in return is probably the best thing in the world. When in love, you need to take care and pay heed to all that’s necessary to keep the relationship going. Without attention even the best of things can die out in no time. This is the reason why even the best of couples have to go through the painful process of letting you. Do you know why people actually are unhappy in relationship? It is because of a long chain of disappointments and expectations that led to dissatisfaction with the way things have been. Actually you can never pinpoint a single universal fact that is the cause of destruction of relationships. It different for different people. You need not worry yourself so much because with the right efforts and intentions even the worst of situations can be dealt with easily.
Here is how you should turn things around so that you can fix what has gone wrong in the relationship that you once or may be even now hold so dear.
Communicate with your partner
This acquires the numero uno position when it comes to having a great relationship. Communication is an effective tool to banish insecurities and misunderstandings. Through opening up channels of communication you gave try and root out specific cause of all troubles in your relationship. For most of us, the easiest way out is to go for the silent treatment. This actually works because it is convenient. In the process irreparable harm is caused to the relationship.
Of course, you may avoid the conflicting arguments initially but for the long term happiness in the relationship, it is necessary that you understand what your partner requires or expects from you. In the same way, through communication you could let your fears and issues become known.
Learn to pardon each other’s mistakes
We are not perfect. Couples are individuals too who have their own set of shortcomings. Expecting perfection is the perfect recipe for disaster. When your partner confesses their wrongdoings, you should have an open outlook towards him/ her. It takes immeasurable amount of strength to take resort to the truth. If you are in the habit of drawing quick conclusions and judging there is a great possibility that your partner fears letting out his secrets. This is when both of you start drifting away from each other.
Instead of yelling at him, deal the situation with rationality. If you feel the mistake can’t be undone, then you can have your way. However, before judging analyse if you should be subject to equal treatment considering the fact that you may have hidden secrets which aren’t out yet.
Concentrate on what binds you to him
Instead of focussing on what separates you from his way of looking at him, focus on the commonalities. None of us are exactly the same as our partners. Men and women are different. Agree or not. If you find that there are difference that cannot be solved, start being more logical. What actually attracted you to him in the first place? Are those qualities still in place? If you feel like it was all a farce with nothing to do with the way he is now then you can opt for other measures. However, if minor differences exist, then look beyond them. Sometimes, you have to stop being too analytical in love. Love is but a matter of the heart. So, soften up and look at ways how you can get together again.
Give up on the “winning” mentality
Sometimes we forget that we are a team in relationships. There is no “you” and “me” but always “us” in relationships. If you solely focus on winning at every fight, having your way at every crucial decision and want to get things done at your own sweet time with complete disregard for the person you claim to love; then you are doing no good for the relationship. Rather, you are serving your selfish needs. On issues where your interests diverge, learn to think of your man as your partner and not your enemy. Think of how both of you can win. It should be a mutual affair, a two way process. Give up when you need to. Give back what your partner does for you. It is not always about unconditional love. Love has conditions too!
“If you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.” This quote by Martin Luther King Jr. can help you motivate yourself to understand that anything can be achieved with the right path of action. Just keep moving forward. Take small steps and you will see glorious results in your relationships as well.