Have you been seeing someone off lately and he is distant all of a sudden? Things started off pretty well and you saw some potential which got you attracted to this guy. But now you have started noticing his unavailability which is getting too obvious with each passing day. Or maybe he is with you, but something definitely seems off which you don’t really understand. It is driving you crazy and you have resorted to every means of blaming yourself or over thinking why he is acting that way.
You might want to confront him and know the reason for the cold shoulder that he is giving you, but it is still a scary thought right now because you don’t want to offend him more. You want him back with you just the way he was before but you just can’t figure the way out since you don’t have a clear answer to why he is acting unavailable. Remember that such behaviour has always a dark history. Something might still be lingering on his mind which is why he is behaving the way he is. You could either try and be patient and constructively help him address these issues or just walk out if things get too much on your nerves or crush your self-respect. Here are a few possible signs he is acting unavailable:
He never wants to communicate
When you find the person that you truly love, you would want to tell him/ her everything that concerns you now as well as everything that concerned your lives in the past. That is something that will be constant with someone you want to spend some quality time with. If this man you are with does not find the necessity to share his fears, secrets and feelings with you; then he doesn’t consider you important enough to be open with you. He perhaps mistrusts you or hasn’t yet given you that place in his life where he could trust you with issues that affect him.
He makes excuses all the time
He seems to be busy all the time. He has no moment to spare to even text or call you, let alone spending some time with you. He knows exactly how to make you believe in his excuses. This is the reason why he is great with excuses. Where there is no will, there is no way. Remember this all the time when you try and believe in what he tells you blindly. If he did want to have something concrete with you, he would do that. If he did want to take you out, he would squeeze out sometime to see you. The list of reasons why he cannot do what you want will be endless.
He has no future plans with you
So, you might be with this guy for quite some time now and he surely is having a great time with you. But does he talk about the future with you? Do you think it will affect him if you aren’t there in the picture? The problem with dating these days is everyone wants to have the most convenient time. They refuse to take any responsibility for their acts and words. Such men are in plenty and it is hard to sieve them out from those who are real keepers. So, the point here is guys who are unavailable will always have a casual attitude towards you.
He never keeps his words
Men who are emotionally unavailable will always make big promises and will rarely keep their words. He will make random promises to you with no intention of fulfilling them. They are those who beat their own drums and tell people about their money and what they do or what holidays have been lined up. When it comes to real performance, they are either nowhere to be found or they don’t live up to what they had you believe. It is always difficult to fully trust such guys because you never know when they would bail out on you.
He seeks validity everywhere
Men who are emotionally unavailable are like that because of the emotional lacuna that has been growing inside them. They find the necessity to seek validity and attention wherever they go just so that the superficial happiness is taken care of. The fact that such happiness fades away too soon, they always need to be constantly pampered. The fact the he is incapable of taking care of the peace within himself, he will always find it difficult to be emotionally available for people. With time you will find him setting high expectations on you and the moment you find it difficult to keep up, he will flake out.