Matters of the heart are complex. The worst part, people can do little to make you feel better unless you want to help yourself out. Breakups and even sudden loss of the person you love can drive you crazy. In fact unless you experience it yourself it is very difficult to even empathise with someone in this situation. Breaking up can tear you apart leaving you at a terrible state with no comebacks. Even if you are the one who ended it, it still can be a major cause of your pain. However, you have all the power and capacity to do what’s best for you. This is basic human instinct. SURVIVAL. When you know what to do, you can help yourself to come out of a self-destructive situation. Here are a few ways in which you can ease the pain of missing someone that you are currently going through.
Control your thoughts:
It is a very peculiar fact about the brain. We can learn and unlearn as well. You can allow only specific thoughts to rule your mind and banish the rest that cause you hurt or those that do you no good in general. In the very same way you attract happiness by choosing to only think of things that cause you happiness. What I am trying to state is keeping all your negative feelings on hold. Quickly switch over to happy thoughts when negativity creeps in. Start slowly. you will be amazed at how quickly you cab brainwash yourself to think of things that serve your purpose.
Indulge in new activities
Don’t stagnate yourself. With the person or without him, your life should always be on the path of growth. The moment you stagnant boredom kicks in and you are tempted to attract negative thoughts subconsciously. Keeping yourself engaged will not just help you become better at life but also make you a brand new person. So rather than confining yourself to a place and making your life miserable, go out and try new things. In case your partner broke up with you there is no point crying over what cannot be brought back. There are plenty of new opportunities waiting for you out there. At this point of time you are in no state to gauge remotely what the future has in store. So, stop assuming and move ahead.
Don’t force yourself give it time
I understand that you may not be in a situation to go after another man right now. You may just not be in the state to think of a new relationship. However, is there a specific date which you feel will be auspicious to start over? Of course you can never say. There is no rule book that states the number of days you need to invite pain and misery to your life just because you had a break up. Either today or tomorrow, you are supposed to move ahead. You have to embrace what life if offering you at the moment. Sometimes, we feel scared, we question ourselves if we are being fair to our ex by jumping quickly into something that makes us feel happy right after a breakup. Understand this: You shouldn’t wait for anyone or anything to do what makes you happy. Follow this golden rule.
Avoid going to places that they frequently visit
You must be tempted to run into your ex. You might just wish to see him for one last time. Do you really think that’s going to help? No! It will only flood you with unwanted memories and delay your progress in moving ahead with your life. You are going to keep wishing to see him more often. The fact that you met him will leave imprints and will be even more difficult to let go of his thoughts that have been causing you pain. So, instead of hindering your own progress, look out for other places to spend your time in. Who knows you might bump into better opportunities?
Avoid any sort of discussion about your past
When you constantly talk about your ex with your friends and family you unknowingly entertain thoughts about him. Even if you want to bicker, you are only drawing him closer to yourself. Stop seeking refuge in what others have to tell you about your breakup. Stop seeking for validation of what you have done or what was done to you. It won’t help you in any way. If all that you have to talk about centres around your ex, even your friends will eventually resent being in your company. Instead take an interest in their lives. Help them out and seek help for brand new avenues that you could head towards. I am sure your friends will always love to see you in a better state.