Not every person finds to easy to communicate what they feel and what bothers them. It takes times to build that trust and be vulnerable before someone, even the one you love. However, if you are good at communicating, and you expect that equally from your partner as well, you might find it too frustrating when he chooses to close himself and it gets tougher for you to break down that shell which he builds around. If you want to have a strong relationship with someone and build a deeper connection that lasts long, you should be able to discuss whatever you want with them and no topic should be off limits.
You should be able to open your heart out and communicate everything that you want to. While you might like to have your set of secrets buried in your heart, with a partner where there is deep mutual love, even your secrets should be easy to discuss about. For some time it may be reasonable for your partner to be able to trust you before they finally open up. But with time, if he still chooses to hide things, he may not be serious about you totally. Here are a few things that you partner should be comfortable discussing with you or else you should be this relationship a serious thought again:
Their real feelings about you
Your partner should be able to tell you what they love about you. If they are hesitant in discussing their real feelings they might not actually be serious about you. This is probably because they may not have thought about you in depth or you figure nowhere in their story. While they don’t need to tell you ‘I love you’ a hundred time a day to prove their love, they should still be able to express their feelings. If you head on into a committed relationship that requires your sincerity, sacrifices, adjustments and greater compromises you should be clear about your standing in the relationship. [Read: 13 Reasons your boyfriend is ideally good!]
Your future together
Your partner should be able to discuss what kind of a future they hope for themselves. You should be able to open up on marriage issues, the kind of place you want to be in and the likes. If he is hesitant in discussing issues that can affect your future together then there are chances he is not sure about a future with you. You will find it extremely confusing to understand where your relationship is heading to if you have to keep wondering whether you even fit in their future plans. [Read: 7 things you should ask your future partner]
The question of having kids
While it is okay that you are exercising your reproductive rights but it is important that you understand that a relationship requires a equal footing when it comes to the question of kids. Your partner might be heartbroken later if he/ she has been wanting to have kids and you choose to break it out to them later that you don’t wish to go down that road. If you have differing opinions, that should be discussed at the start to avoid heartbreaks later.
Your sexual preferences
Engaging in physical activity is a sacred space for every couple. If your partner is too closed of shy about letting you know what they prefer or don’t it will be difficult for you to satisfy them or keep them happy in the sexual realm. You should be able to discuss freely about what turns you on, where he should work on. But remember this needs to be done respectfully because people generally have inhibitions when it comes to sexual talks and you shouldn’t make it difficult for them by criticising their skills in a condescending manner. This shows your level of comfort with the person where you can not just bare out your body but also your mind before the person you love. [Read: Dirty text messages that you need to send him right now!]
Finance and career
This is probably the cornerstone of every relationship. Unless your finances are discussed you could end up falling short of your partner’s expectations and it might create greater issue sin the future. So, if your partner is able to open up to you about their monetary matters, you are definitely someone they trust you with their hard earned money. Also, while you may not be interested in the details of your partner’s career, you should still have the place in his life where he discusses his job and his later plans.
Everyone has their own set of insecurities and worries. Your partner should be able to open up to you about what makes them anxious, what their greatest flaws and shortcomings are. Unless you are aware of their vulnerabilities and fears you cannot claim to know them well.