WEDDING JITTERS – WAYS TO DEAL WITH IT
As a person living in this day and age, we have all grown up being sceptical of all the things around us. There are always niggling negative thoughts in your head that eat at you. These thoughts have severe effect on your behaviour and you take decisions which are not in your best interests. Not to mention the amount of stress attached to it. Wedding, I’m sure you’ll agree, is like restarting your life with a new identity and new people. The stress factor (or better still, uncertainty) is then considered a given. If you’ve ever solved a complex mathematical equation in your life, you will agree that half your work is done the moment you crack those unknown variables. Pre-wedding stress is as good as a set of complex equations, and half your problems will be solved the moment you realize exactly what is bugging you.
Are you feeling anxious about your upcoming wedding? Sick to your stomach? Having bad dreams? Does the sight of the dress fill you with dread? Feeling like you may have made a mistake saying “yes” or proposing? If you answered yes, you are experiencing pre-wedding jitters. This is your subconscious telling you that something is not right and you need to listen to it. It may be that you are nervous about your own ability to be a husband or wife, anxious that your fiancé can’t be the spouse you need or both. Having wedding jitters does not mean that the marriage is doomed or that it is time to call off the wedding. But all jitters mean that an intervention is needed. Something is making you anxious and you need to understand what it is.
We all have an internal compass that guides us in our life and when we go against it, there is a reaction. At first, you feel a gentle tugging at the back of your brain; something does not feel right. You feel “off.” If you pay attention to this feeling, the cause or causes will slowly become clear. But if you don’t pay attention, your subconscious will get louder and louder and the bad feelings begin to turn to physical symptoms — you may have bad dreams, difficulty sleeping, stomach issues, illness or even injuries.
It is the bigger picture that matters, after all. Wedding is a promise to be together in love, to be mad about each other and not because of each other. Hence seek answers to the thoughts in your head, talk to friends and family and understand the root cause for it. Asking some self-reflective questions like what does wedding mean to me, why do I want to get married, and why have I chosen the person I am getting married to can give you clarity. Since this is one of the major decisions of your life, you definitely do not want to feel uncomfortable about it. Once you realize what stresses you, the next steps are easier to take.