The night has approached, and the moon is the only light I see. As I move my fingers across the laptop with millions of thoughts wandering in my mind…. a sound of mourning is drawn near to my ears. The sound I’ve gotten familiar to since the day I’ve shifted to this apartment.
“Mr. Mehta is beating his wife again. The only thing this man has learnt is to get drunk and torture his wife. Poor Malati! Not every wife is as lucky as Mrs. Banerjee”, says my mother with a sympathetic tone.
Mrs. Banerjee is another neighbour of mine; an educated woman working in a Multi National Corporation and living a seemingly perfect life with her husband, two children and in-laws. Whenever I bombard my mother with questions like “Why do you think Mrs. Banerjee is lucky??” …. the only reply she has in her defence is “Her husband lets her work and wear western clothing. What more could women wish for??”.
This reasoning is not enough to let me have my peace of mind. Few questions still scream inside me waiting to get answered.
No praise for all the work that she does
What is a matter of compliment for a husband is not enough reason to get honoured for a wife! Why? We’ve managed to have many more Mrs. Banerjees in our society today. All thanks to the growing awareness about women empowerment, women who are well educated and have a perfect balance between their personal life and the professional one. Women who work 9 to 5, get back home and prepare a cup of tea for their husbands first before they get a sip. These women may be applauded in those revolutionary articles and newspapers, but they are seen as just doing their duties in the real world. Why is a man crowned with the title of ‘The Greatest Husband’ if he allows his wife to share his burden by earning while on the contrary, a woman is discarded from the title of a ‘Good Wife’ if she expects her husband to share her burden in the kitchen??
Slavery at home: Loss of worth
If she can be the boss in her office, why can’t she be the boss in her house! This isn’t just another feminist article saying things in favour of the concept of ‘My Choice’. This article is about lending the power of making choices to the one who is wiser enough to make those. Logically, the better decision-maker should be given the opportunity to make commitments on behalf of his/her spouse to make sure their life gets better. But why is the husband assumed as the default decision-maker? Has the testosterone something to do with enhancing the skill of governing things? Ironically, she can take right decisions about the way a product should be launched in the market, she can manage to get promoted in her office for putting forward the most effective ideas; BUT she can’t make correct choices for herself and her family!
Control over a woman’s life
Life changes after marriage, and a girl needs to change herself too once she becomes a woman. Totally justified. But a relationship demands changes from both the partners and not just one. Why is this considered to be the moral duty of a woman to say *yes* to everything her husband instructs her to do while a husband is expected to be thanked if he agrees to fulfil his wife’s wishes? She may even get honoured with the highest civilian award in the country, but still she needs to wait for her husband’s green signal in every walks of life. A husband’s love and care for his wife allows him to master her, but a wife’s love and care for him is estimated by her obedience!
Few words are not enough to define what women empowerment means, which is way more than just eradicating social evils like domestic violence and dowry. There are infinite other subtle, unconventional tortures a woman has to go which are not easily recognised by the society. A woman who seems perfectly happy may gets stressed at times when she’s prisoned behind the bars of such social norms. You cannot lose sight of these issues if you wish to have a healthy society that gives a woman her due respect.
Till then, the moon is still the only light I see as the sun has not risen completely yet!